'We just talk and talk and it has lifted my spirits enormously'
The Inquirer joins Christmas card appeal creating true friendships and bringing joy to thousands
Just 18 months ago, Sheila Carroll was chronically isolated. Most of her time was spent alone and lonely. “I was pretty depressed…I just didn’t sort of know what to do with myself. I kind of lost myself a bit…” she says.
Loneliness can devastate lives, impacting both mental and physical wellbeing. Age Scotland research indicates that more than half of those aged over 50 in Scotland experience loneliness. In Edinburgh, two in five households are single person – the majority of these older people. Age Scotland maintains every street in our city will have at least one older person living in social isolation. The cost of living crisis has added to this, with less money available for socialising.
But help is at hand. In Sheila’s case through the Vintage Vibes project. Nicky Shallcross, working from home, was also feeling isolated in her own way. She came across Vintage Vibes, which seeks to put people in touch, and was paired with Sheila. She said: “Nicky came around and we just hit it off right away. We just talk and talk and it has just lifted my spirits enormously, honestly.”
Nicky is equally enthusiastic at how things have worked out: “We’ve totally just hit it off straight away. We’ve been chatting non-stop and giggling ever since.” she says.
Sheila and Nikki now have a genuine friendship, but more than that, Sheila’s confidence and physical activity has massively increased. She is now part of the VIP Voices group who advocate for older people’s concerns, and recently met with the Minister for Equalities Kaukab Stewart to discuss issues important to older people in Scotland.
Meantime a staggering 2000 people in Edinburgh are estimated to be in need of the kind of support offered by Vintage Vibes.
[video of Sheila and Nicky]
This is exactly the kind of mutual, open-ended, real friendships that Vintage Vibes aims to create. The project was established in 2014, after Edinburgh was found to be the loneliest city in the UK for older people. The two charities behind Vintage Vibes, Space the Broomhouse Hub and LifeCare Edinburgh, carried out their own research with older people experiencing isolation; “Older people experiencing isolation were saying that the only people they were seeing were duty-bound or paid to be there,” says Georgia Artus, Development Manager for Vintage Vibes.
Artus and her team found that support for older people saw them as “beneficiaries,” rather than somebody who had their own interests and passions to offer and tended to be limited to a certain amount of time, or an end goal. “It felt like a duty… rather than an actual friendship” says Artus.
Vintage Vibes set out to do things differently; taking time to meet older people (called VIPs) and befriending volunteers, and matching pairs who share interests and hobbies. The results are fantastic; Vintage Vibes friendships have lasted 5, 7, 8 years, and have led to meeting each other's families or sharing Christmases.
Older people who’ve participated in Vintage Vibes have started using public transport for the first time in years, joined clubs and gone to social events, as their entire life starts to blossom because of the confidence and strength and sense of self gained from a true, positive friendship. 97% of VIPs said that Vintage Vibes has helped them feel less isolated, and 91% say it has improved their mental health. Forthcoming research will also show how many of their VIPs are being prevented from going into hospital, experiencing crisis through falls, going into residential care, needing increased care at home, or needing mental health support and prescriptions.
“Even with that added support and community, Christmas can be really hard for somebody who is chronically isolated… because of that ever-present reminder of families coming together,” says Georgia Artus.
SMALL ACT, BIG IMPACT
Vintage Vibes’s Christmas Card appeal began in 2017, following the same principles as their befriending activities; it’s about real connection. If you decide to write a Christmas Card, you’ll be writing to a unique, individual person. You’ll receive a personal bio about the achievements, passions and personality of the person you’re writing to.
“When you write your Christmas card to somebody who is learning Russian right now, you might be writing your Christmas card to somebody who has contributed to knitting to make the largest knitted Christmas tree in Europe, you might be writing to somebody who has travelled the world and is trying to write a book about it.” says Artus.
What’s certain is that this small act won’t go unnoticed: “When I received my Christmas cards, I think I cried a lot,” said Sheila. “My cards were mainly from local children and were so adorable they touched my heart. I love the company and joy that Vintage Vibes brings to me and so many lonely people.”
Georgia also hopes that this kind of celebration of the variety of fantastic older people living in Edinburgh will tackle ageism. “One of the things that encourages social isolation in the long term is this idea of not recognising people as individuals, grouping all people of a similar age together, that can really increase the likelihood of division between generations… Members of the public might look at neighbours or somebody at the bus stop and think you know what they’re probably more like me than I thought and start up a conversation, build that friendship and have that change in perception.” says Artus.
Lothians MSP Foysol Choudhury paid tribute to the work. The co-convenor of the Scottish Parliament’s Cross-Party Group on Volunteering, said : “The impact of loneliness is widespread, with Vintage Vibes having already reached a staggering 30,000 hours of friendship support in Edinburgh.”
At the Inquirer, we believe in going to the root of the issue and backing ourselves with evidence. We’re delighted to be supporting an organisation which shares those values. Each of the core team will be sending a Christmas card this year, and we fully encourage you to do so too. Just head to this link, select “Send a Christmas Card” to donate £3 and learn who you’ll be writing a card for.
Make sure you send your card by 6th December or drop it off at one of their locations in person by the 10th, so the team can check over and deliver them to all their VIPs by Christmas. If you’d like to do more, you can set up a regular donation or sign up to be a befriender; with up to 2000 isolated older people in Edinburgh without friendship support, the charity is always looking to expand. We’ll be updating you in the New Year on how your Christmas Cards have brightened up the festive season for our fellow Edinburghers.
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